We worked at a Christian boarding school in south Texas for high school students. My abuser was the principal, and I was a first year teacher. We lived on campus with other staff.
One day, the son of an employee came to school with a bad cut on his arm. He said his mother got mad at him, took a broken plate and cut his arm. I was horrified as were others. Others had witnessed the father/employee raging at students. This father spoke about their son’s mental health and said, “he is adopted”. I heard that his mom admitted to cutting him but that it was “an accident”.
When employees started asking if we should call CPS, the abuser said no, we shouldn’t bring the “state” into this. “It is a private matter.”
I thought about that for a while.
Then I called CPS and reported the mother and my abuser for not reporting it.
We had only been married three years, max. This was before battered wife syndrome or Stockholm syndrome had set in.
I don’t know if anyone ever knew it was me. Maybe someone else called too, I do not know.
I’m talking about it now because it shows just how far the abuser went to brainwash me over the next 3 decades, to keep my mouth shut when CPS needed to be called. It was my character and personality to call for justice when people were harmed.
But recovery from domestic violence is recognizing how you were manipulated.
How they did cruel things to make you silent to protect your children.
How they tore you down so you would not be who God intended you to be.
It is all very insidious and wicked.
But recognizing the slow turn of the burner as you sat in the kettle of water helps to unlock any hold the past has on your future.
It is true that “Don’t fool yourselves. Bad friends will destroy you. “ (1 Corinthians 15:33)
But thankfully, we can “Let the spirit change your way of thinking and make you into a new person.” (Ephesians 4:23-24a)
Are you in a destructive marriage? Are you trying to divorce a person who has no conscience? I have been there, and I would appreciate the opportunity to help you navigate these difficult times.
Please email me to sign up for a 15-minute consultation and see if I am the person you are looking for.
Comments